What We Have, Is Failure To Communicate!

My kids have always been very good at communicating. The twins have always had a great vocabulary and they know how to use it.
My youngest also has a very good grasp of the language.
Today, I discovered one of the ramifications of this particular skill.
Having kids who are good speakers, I sometimes forget that they are just that...kids.
Particularly with Mitch, the young one.
So, today, he asked me to write out some math problems for him to work on......yeah, you read that correctly. He wanted me to write out several math problems so he can practice. In actuallity, he just likes to show off, but I don't care. I think it's cool that he likes to do math. I didn't like to do math until Calc II in college.
So, I wrote out several problems of the form:
   20
+ 15
+ 10

He works out the problems and gives them back to me. The first problem was off by a huge number..like 40. I asked him, to review the problem and let me know what he did wrong. After checking it out, he informed me that it was correct!
So, I read the problem to him, and this is where I discovered the problem....
You see, when I write a 2, I make it all loopy...the 2s that he sees are more like the two's in this font...no loops. His little mind saw that, and the closest number he could associate that with was a 6. If you substituted a 6 for the number, then his answer was correct!
After telling him this was a 2, he redid the problem and got it right.
I got to thinking about this....about how experience makes all the difference in the world...how I take for granted what my kids know (and don't know) and how I maybe shouldn't do that.
Also, if you wonder why it's so hard for computers to do things that you may think simple, it's for the very same reason...there's brazillion's of ways to do the same thing, but until you do it (or see it or smell it or taste it) it's very difficult to contextualize things.
Mitch saw a number he hadn't seen before and tried to put it in context...the best he could do was think that Dad had wrote the number backwards!
The cool thing about this is, the next time, he WILL be able to put it into context...we both just got a bit smarter today.

St. Agnes

Card tricks are good....

The Creative Process

Probably since high school, I've liked to write. Part of the reason I started this blog is so that I could (hopefully) improve my writing skills. I've enjoyed writing this blog and I enjoy that I look out for things that I'd like to write about.
Also, I've started to try and find information around the writing process itself. Where ideas come from, what to do with them, etc, etc. I've even bought a book!

I've linked to John Scalzi several times over the last few months. One of the reasons why I like his work is precisely because he likes to help aspiring writers (of which, I find myself among).
This month, he's asked dozens of authors that he knows to post something on his blog about the writing process. Today, he's asked Elizabeth Bear, and she's posted a very good thought on the process behind writing a novel.
If you're interested in writing, take a look and let me know what you think.

Do You Know What I Know?

The Chicago Tribune has a Christmas Carol Quiz online: HERE

I missed 20 out of 25 which is a solid B-.
Not so coincedentally, that's what I graduated both High School and College with.
I'm consistent!

BTW, if you take the quiz, also check out the 'Scared of Santa' pictures too...funny!

p.s. Props to my SIL: Billie for the heads-up on this. You Rock!

Christmas for Geeks

This was too cool for school.
Somebody's posted Christmas Cards sent out by King George (Lucas) over the last 30 years or so...I wonder if you could find the entire collection on eBay?

Here's my fave:

Just 'cause

“ In brightest day, in blackest night,
No evil shall escape my sight
Let those who worship evil's might,
Beware my power...Green Lantern's light!”
        —Hal Jordan/All Current Lanterns

Love My Nieces (and their dad too, I guess!)

Don't send a lame Holiday eCard. Try JibJab Sendables!

Hark, Abbott!

Ok, so for as long as I can remember, I've been a fan of Abbott and Costello. My all time, number 1 most awesomestly favorite comic skit is Who's On First by A and C.
I used to have it on audio cassette and would listen to it over and over again while I was working.
Recently, while doing some research for a Christmas Party we are having at work, I came across a version of Who's On First, dubbed over Yoda and Jar-Jar Binks. That was pretty funny, so I sent it to my son for his pleasure.
To my shock, horror and SHAME, he informed my wife that he had never heard this skit before. Alas, I have failed as a father....sorry Matt.

She told him to search for the original, which he did and loved, so hopefully, he should recover from my indescretion.

Anyway, since then, I've been watching it again, and while viewing on YouTube, I notice a Shakespearian Version of the the classic skit. This is done very well, and is worth your time to watch. Enjoy:

Geek Sports

I saw this on Wired* today....AWESOME!

Here's a list of the top 10 Geek Sports:

1) Racewalking
The sporting equivalent of marching band. Inhaler required.

2) Segway Polo
The only sport in the world in which Woz (and his trusty personal transporter) could make the A team.

3) Badminton
When tennis balls get silly drunk, they dress up like shuttlecocks.

4) Hacky Sack
Based on our exhaustive research of this game, prog-rock T-shirts and ponytails aren't mandatory, but they help.

5) Curling
More a physics exercise than physical exercise. Bonus: tracksuits.

6) Jousting
Armor + the potential for internal hemorrhaging = pretty cool. If only the Ren Faire were every weekend.

7) Fencing
The fake swords — they're actually fake lightsabers. (Jedi mind trick.)

8) Disc Golf
In an ideal world, we would all put down our clubs and pick up a disc. Frolf, anyone?

*Hyperlinks mine

Goodbye Evel Knievel....

Friday was a sad day.
Not sad in the sense that anything drastic or horrible happened to me or my family.
Not sad because someone hurt my feelings.
Not sad for any real, personal, reasons.
Yet, it was sad none the less.
Evel Knievel died on Friday, and that makes me sad.

I started thinking about Evel, when I heard the news, and that sent me back to my childhood.
I can remember, pretty clearly, Saturday afternoons spent in front of the family TV, watching ABC's Wide World of Sports.
That's how I was introduced to Evel Knievel. I remember watching him do his daring stunts on TV and thinking how I wished I could do that.
I wished I could jump all those buses on a motorcycle.
I wished I could jump the fountain at the casino.
I wished I could jump the Snake River*...of course, so did he!

I remember talking about Evel (even his name was cool then!) to my friends, all the time. If I had a dime for everytime I told some one 'He broke every bone in his body at least once!', I wouldn't be rich, but it would be a Merry Christmas!

The cool thing about these kinds of trips down memory lane, is that they usually don't stop there....with what brought you. So it was with me.

I kept thinking about those Saturday afternoons...how many cool or interesting things I used to see. You never knew what you'd get:
The Harlem Globetrotters
Muhammad Ali and Howard Cosell (DOWN GOES FRASIER!!! DOWN GOES FRASIER!!!)
Gymnastics
Figure Skating
and all started with those famous words by Jim McKay (I can still hear him now):

Spanning the globe to bring you the constant variety of sport… the thrill of victory… and the agony of defeat… the human drama of athletic competition… this is ABC's Wide World of Sports!

Cool thing about that is, when they said 'agony of defeat', they always showed a picture of this poor fellow, Vinko Bogataj, crashing down a ski jump. My uncle was there, under that ramp and saw the whole thing live. How cool is that!?!?

At the end of the weekend, I realized, 'Yeah, I'm sad that Evel died'. I'm sad for his family, particularly Robbie, who have to deal with this loss. My prayers go out to them.
However, it was a bittersweet sadness. I liked remembering. I liked thinking about those simple times when I was young and I'd put a board over some bricks and pretend I was jumping 25 buses instead of 25 Hot Wheels Cars.
I liked watching Ali beat someone up, or Nadia Comaneci win gold medals, or the Medowlark Lemon toss in a half court hook shot (swish) to beat the Washington Generals (again!).

So, once again, Evel Knievel delivers...if not through the exhilaration of some daring jump, then through a genteel trip down memory lane.


*I think this is also when Evel Jumped the Shark!

Something Is Seriously Wrong Here

So, you've heard of the teacher in Sudan whose classroom voted to name a teddybear "Muhammad"? At first, when 'some' parents found out, she was apparently tried, convicted and sentenced to 12 days in jail and deportation. Here crime? Insulting Religion.
Now, from my point of view, that punishment would have been a reward. At least she would get out of that nutty land.

However, there has been a new twist. In the Sudan, on Friday, after a bunch of Muslims got out of their service, there was RIOTING IN THE STREETS AND CALLS FOR THIS WOMENS EXECUTION!
ZOMGBBQ!!!11!!1

Here's a pull quote from FoxNews.com

They burned pictures of Gibbons and called for her execution (emphasis mine), saying, "No tolerance: Execution," and "Kill her, kill her by firing squad."

How do you deal with this kind of insanity?
What in the world did these guys hear in their sermons that could make them want to execute a women because she let the kids of her classroom name a teddybear after their precious prophet.

Let's go all the way here...let's assume for a minute that she was malicious. Let's assume that she HATES Muslims and their Prophet, and that she named the bear Muhammad because she's mean and thinks very little of the guy. Let's assume the bear was UGLY and mean looking with a giant L on it's forehead!

STILL! What kind of INSANE, messed up kind of human being do you have to be to make the leap from that to "Oh, well, she deserves to die"?

When someone uses the Lords Name in vain, or says something about God that I don't particularly care for, it can make me upset, or even angry. But if there is one and only one thing I know for sure, it is: My God doesn't need little ole' me to stick up for Big Ole' Him! He got along fine before me and will get along fine after I'm gone. I don't need to fight His battles for him. He can take care of Himself.

Can Muhammad or Allah or whoever say the same? Why do these people feel the need to defend their God and his prophet from mean people like female, British TEACHERS! GAAAH! (calm down Donnie, calm down!)

Folks, that is one crazy religion, and that is one crazy group of people.

Happy Thanksgiving!

No one says Happy Thanksgiving better than my favorite cartoon character!

Change-Not Everything Happens For A Reason

A few months back, I was introduced to some books by a writer named John Scalzi. They are excellent reads and I highly recommended them. I also was introduced to one of his blogs, which soon became one of my favorite places to lurk.

Every week in his blog, he invites other bloggers to write about a topic of his choice. When you participate, you post the topic and invite others to do so:

Weekend Assignment #191: Show us, or tell us a story about, change. A before and after picture of the street where you grew up, a story about meeting an old friend after many years, two pictures of yourself separated by a number of years, a tale about changing your life, or showing or tell us about something in the process of changing itself. Any of these is good. And doesn't have to be a negative, because sometimes change is a good thing.

Want to play along? Go to John's journal here

This week the topic is Change.
I've been wanting to participate in these assignements for a while, and either I didn't have the guts to try a post, or the topic didn't strike me, so when I saw his post today about this weeks assignement, I started thinking.
At first a few thoughts on my career and how it's changed popped into my head, then thoughts of the kids, our church life and a few other similarly appropriate ideas flitted thru....but nothing stuck out.

That all changed tonight however, when my family and I attended the 3rd annual St. Joseph's NICU fashion show.
One of the main speakers of the night was my dear sister in law, Billie. She was a speaker tonight because she has two, wonderful, little girls who both spent 110 days in the St. Joe's NICU when they were born rediculously early.
During the night, watching my 'little' sister tell the tale of the amazingly difficult and trying time she and her husband have gone thru since the girls were born, I saw, for really the first time, this remarkable women.
Not that Billie hasn't always been remarkable....she has. And not that she hasn't always been a women, she has (hehehe) but I guess I just saw her tonight in a new light.
She's changed...she's grown, she's struggled and she's overcome so very much and that's remarkable. She's remarkable.
Billie in 2004

Billie in 2007

She doesn't look much different, but she's become a strong, determined and formidable advocate for the NICU at St. Joe's as well as a vocal, articulate spokeswomen for raising premature birthing awareness everywhere.

Equally remarkable though is the change in her girls. I could tell you their tale, but I'm not qualified...only Billie and maybe someone as talented as Mr. Scalzi could do it justice. However, I'm posting a few pictures...then and now.
Eden and Holland in 2004:


Eden and Holland, Now:

I'm not entirely sure if this is within the scope of the weekend assignment that John was looking for...pointing to another blog, but if you want to read a story of change, then look to the story of Holland and Eden, the Micropreemie Twins.

Christmas list...Year 2

Last year I posted a Christmas wish list, so I figured I'd do it again...without the rant.
Feel free to gift any of these!!!
- The Happiest Days of Our Lives by Wil Wheaton
- Guitar Hero Encore: Rock the 80's for the PS2
- Please Santa! I've been goot!!!1!

Gift Cards

• iTunes has become a big part of my life now that I have an iPod Touch!
  
• Best Buy
  
• Home Depot
  
• Any one of several dining establishments
  

T-Shirts!

• My Rules
  
• Video Games Ruined My Live
  
• Poker Hand Values
  
• Birds and the Bees
  
• At XKCD there are two shirts, one called Useless and the other called Witty (story of my life!) that are schweet!
  

Books

• Thomas Covenant Books!
  
• Android's Dream
  

Don't you wonder about what a Christmas List says about you?
What do you think mine says about me?
What does yours say about you?

You know you're a geek when....

Ingredients List:
1 Star Trek fanatic (check)
1 PS3 Blu-Ray Laser (check)
1 Toy Star Trek Phaser (check)
several pieces of wire and some electrical components (check)

Toss in a dremmel tool and a bit of glue and what do you get?
You get your very own Phaser!


Blu-Ray Laser Phaser! - video powered by Metacafe

You know what this means, don't you?

SWEET!
A new study came out today...it says being overweight isn't so terrible afterall!

Being 25 pounds overweight doesn't appear to raise your risk of dying from cancer or heart disease, says a new government study that seems to vindicate Grandma's claim that a few extra pounds won't kill you.

I guess that means the DIET'S OVER!!!

Ok, not really, but still, it's kinda good news, but also a little irritating.

Doesn't it seem to always happen? First, some study comes out and says that something we love is bad for us. It can't be something we don't like...oh no...it's something we love. Like chocolate or coffee or wine or whatever.
Wouldn't it be awesome if some study came out and said that paying our bills was detrimental to our health! (ok, I know, it is, but work with me!!)

Could you imagine that conversation: "I'm sorry Mr. Banker, but my health insurance won't cover me so long as I'm paying my car payment....take it up with them!"

So stuff we like is bad for us, then, a few years later, new studies come out and say why the first study was all wet and stupid.
For years we've heard that being even a few pounds overweight is equivalent to putting a gun to your head and pulling the trigger. Now, it comes out that there may actually be BENEFITS to it! Huh? What did I miss?

Chocolate was bad for you...now, not so much.
Coffee was bad for you...now, not so much.
Wine was bad for you...now, not so much.
Being overwieght was bad for you...now, not so much.

Don't get me wrong, all those things CAN be bad for you....in excess.
So can excercise, so can reading, so can tofu (whatever that is!)

I guess God had it right when he said "temperate in all things". Amazing! (sw)

Elbow.
And.
Send.

What! No plans to build flying cars!!!

Drat!


Mean Automakers Dash Nation's Hope For Flying Cars

I love The Onion!

More Cowbell

Probably posted this before...and I'll probably post it again, but....
I was listening on my SICK new iPod, and (Don't Fear) The Reaper started flowin' out of it...and of course, that always makes me think: MORE COWBELL!!!!

Shakespearian Insult

I've got a widget on my iGoogle page that generates Shakespearian Insults...today's was ridiculously cool:

Do you set down your name in the scroll of youth, that are written down old with all the characters of age? Have you not a moist eye, a dry hand, a yellow cheek, a white beard, a decreasing leg, an increasing belly? Is not your voice broken, your wind short, your chin double, your wit single, and every part about you blasted with antiquity? And will you yet call yourself young?
    -Taken from: Henry IV, part 2

Maybe it's just me...

Does this hurt your eyes to look at?
It does me!

Technology Update

Ok, so, from what I understand it's a genetic 'disorder'. My great uncle had it. He passed it down to my dad. My dad passed it on to me, so I've got it, and I'm pretty sure I've passed it on to at least two of my kids.
What might this disorder be you ask? (Go ahead...ask...I'll wait!)
Neophilia
Sounds kinda dirty doesn't it? Well it's not. Basically, I'm a gadget nut.
Well, the latest gadget that I've come into possesion of is an iPod Touch.


Oh dear goodness is this thing cool. I don't even mind having to fiddle around with iTunes in order to get stuff onto it.

It's got a sweet little browser built into it that allows me to surf the web, just like a normal browser (albeit small).

It's got a bit more kick in the volume department than my Nano did, so I can damage my hearing even MORE! CRANK IT TO 11!

The whole Album Browsing thing (I'm sure there's a better name for it, but it, like most things worth knowing, escapes me) is worth the price of admission!

It's got an accelerometer built into it, so it can figure out how your holding the thing and display appropriately. Yeah, I said accelerometer! That's fun to SAY! And I got a gadget with one in it!!!

It also changes the intensity of the picture, based on the brightness of the room you're in!!!

And (oh yeah, there's more!)...I said And, it's got a MULTI TOUCH screen. No single touch sissified screen thingy here...oh no. Multi touch baby!
SWEET!

All in all, this gets five "Dude, this is cool"'s

Dieting Advice You Can Count On

Since the beginning of the year, I've been concerned about my weight. On and off all year, I've been dieting or exercising. I'm currently in a cycle of doing both, and very much enjoying it.
In doing this, I've learned a great deal about dieting, and many, many people come to me for advice regarding this subject. So, in light of this, I felt I should compile a list of commonly asked questions and answers. They are as follows:

---

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable slop.

Q: How can I calculate my body fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain -- Good.

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening. Food is fried these days in vegetable oil. The fact is they're permeated with it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
A: Thicker gravy.

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had.

How many's a Brazilian?

Being a bit of a geek, and hanging around like minded fellows, I've heard the term brazillion thrown around a bit. I've always wondered exactly how many a brazillion is. Now, I know I'm in good company:

Quote of the Day!

From The Onion's horoscope page for this week:

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but laziness will be responsible for its decomposition in the middle of your living room floor.

That makes me giggle.....

Agnes Rocks

Everyday I have a little ritual at work where it check out about a dozen or so comics. I love comics. Have since I was just a wee lad. Of course I do the popular ones, Dilbert, B.C. and such, but I have two that I love that are not so widely known. One is called Kevin and Kell. I've followed it for a few years now. It's strickly web published.
The other, my personal favorite, is called Agnes. Today's comic, in a nutshell, is why she's my favorite:

Human LCD --- Far Out!

Ok, so who among you love their sports team(s)? You may THINK you love your sports team, but, are you as nutty as these South Korean boys toward their soccer team?



The most amazing thing is that they do this with their CLOTHES (not holding up cards). They apparently have a jacket that is one color on the back, one on the front, and that they can open or close to show a third color shirt on the inside. One school has also figured out how to use their pants to make shading.

Now these are fanatics!

Just 'cause it's perty

One of my new, favorite bloggers posted a link to this picture.



Click here for the explanation of the picture...

Cutest. Ever.

Oh. My. Goodness.
If you like cute stories, you're gonna love this story.
If you like cute pictures, you're gonna love this picture.
If you like cute pictures that have cute stories....forget about it!!!

This Story!

Make Your Own Hot Air Balloon!

Kudos to whoever tries this!



If you give this a shot, send me a picture!

One happy dog

This just cracks me up


Wouldn't you like to be able to do this?

Occam's Razor

Well, I crossed another Rubicon this week.
I started a new position here at FoMoCo. I'm working in the ETO Group. That means I'm technical support for (most of) the big shots.
I think it's going to be a pretty cooly job. I get to do some hardware troubleshooting and will be part of setting up new processes to make the company safer and more secure.

While moving, I came across a Word doc that I had printed out and posted in my cube. The printout didn't make the move, so I just printed it again and reposted:

Use Occam's Razor
PLURALITA NON EST PONENDA SINE NECESSITATE

Translated:
Entities should not be multiplied unnecessarily.

Usefulness:
When you have two competing theories which make exactly the same predictions, the one that is simpler is the better.

Boilded Down:
Keep it simple, stupid.

Cool Waste of Time

One of the best/worst features of the internet is the ability to get Lost In Cyberspace. This particularly exists in the blog-o-sphere, where you can get started reading an exceptionally well written, or compelling (or both) blog, and the next thing you know, hours have been blown.
I've been known to spend a few hours just hyperlinking thru Wikipedia. It's fun. You should give it a try.

The other day, a buddy of mine told me about a site he'd read through a few years back and he had recently re-discovered it. He sent me the link. 4 hours later, I had finished the site.
So, as a free service I provide, here is the same link: http://www.brendancahill.com/index.html

The 'Outside The Box' webcomic is one of the coolest, best directed and best set of stories I have read on the 'net yet. I highly recommend it. However, be warned. If you're anything like me, (may the Lord help you) you will need a little time to get through all the stories.

Glittering Jewels of Colossal Ignorance part 3: (Don't Go Breakin' My Heart!)

I'm a big fan of Elton John's music. For as long as I can remember I've liked and listened to him. Crocodile Rock is still one of my favoirite songs.
However, for some silly, silly reason, he decided to talk about the internet and how bad it is for music.
Now usually when someone, especially a musician, talks about the intertubes now-a-days, they are running down illegal downloads and such. That's not the case with Sir Elton however.
He's talking about how music today sucks COMPARED TO THE 70'S!!! Wow...that's huge right there. Apparently, because people are online and using technology and, apparently, not communicating, music is suffering.
Here are some of his quotes:

"We're talking about things that are going to change the world and change the way people listen to music and that's not going to happen with people blogging on the internet."
"I mean, get out there -- communicate."
"Hopefully the next movement in music will tear down the internet."
"Let's get out in the streets and march and protest instead of sitting at home and blogging."
"I do think it would be an incredible experiment to shut down the whole internet for five years and see what sort of art is produced over that span."
"There's too much technology available."

Um...huh?
Maybe someone should send Elton an Internet or two so that he can figure out that more people are communicating more than ever, because of Technology and specifically because of the internets.
He is also quoted as saying: “I am such a Luddite when it comes to making music. All I can do is write at the piano.” So, Elton...if all you can do is write music, maybe, just maybe, you should stop talking about things that you don't know about. Maybe.

5 Questions Feared by (most*) Men

1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat in this?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that each one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

Question #1: What are you thinking about? The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."

This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following: a. "Baseball." b. "Golf." c. "How fat you are." d. "How I would spend the insurance money if you died."

Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you!"

Question #2: Do you love me? The proper response is: "Yes!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, "Yes, dear."

Inappropriate responses include: a. "Oh yeah, bunches." b. "Would it make you feel better if I said yes?" c. "That depends on what you mean by love." d. "Does it matter?" e. "Who, me?"

Question #3: Do I look fat? The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!"

Incorrect answers are: a. "Compared to what?" b. "I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin." c. "A little extra weight looks good on you." d. "I've seen fatter." e. "Sorry, what did you say? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died."

Question #4: Do you think she's prettier than me? Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!"

Incorrect responses include: a. "Yes, but you have a better personality." b. "Not prettier, but definitely thinner." c. "Not as pretty as you when you were her age." d. "Define pretty." e. "Sorry what did you say? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died."

Question #5: What would you do if I died? A definite no-win question. (The real answer, of course, is "Buy a Mustang GT500 and a boat.")

No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions, usually along these lines:

Woman: Would you get married again?
Man: Definitely not!
Woman: Why not -- don't you like being married?
Man: Of course I do.
Woman: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
Man: Okay, I'd get married again.
Woman: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
Man: (audible groan)
Woman: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Man: Where else would we sleep?
Woman: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of her?
Man: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
Woman: And would you let her use my golf clubs?
Man: She can't use them -- she's left-handed.
Woman: (silence)
Man: Crap.


*This applies to most men...not I however. I don't fear these questions!

On Notice

**Update:
Since posting this I've: Finished the plumbing in the basement, played three error free softball games (two of them as 2nd base), and fixed the problem with my plumbing!

I'm it

Ok Billie, here goes. Eight(8) random facts/habits about me:
1. I believe that recreational drugs, prostitution, consuming alcohol and gambling should be legal for everyone over the age of 18 (if you can kill and die for your country, you should be able to drink!). Not that I would partake in any of them (eh hem!) or even believe they are appropriate things that people SHOULD do. I just think they should be legal. Not that these can't be sin and all either...but there should be a difference between what is a sin and what is against the law, and that differnce should be how it impacts others and not oneself.
2. Not counting family, I've kissed a total of 2 girls on the lips in my entire life. I'm married to one of them, and wouldn't have it any other way. Of course, my wife won't let me live down the other one (we were on a BREAK honey!)
3. I have a giant man crush on Wil Wheaton. It's rather pathetic actually.
4. Most people confuse me being frustrated with me being mad. It's frustrating.
5. I like to be called Donnie, even though it makes me sound like I'm five. My dad's Don, and I only get called Donald by my mom, MIL and wife (and occasionlly by my 12 year old son when he wants to get my attention), and only when I'm in trouble with any one (or all) of those three.
6. All things being equal and the opportunity arises, I'd move to Oakland, California tomorrow.
7. I make friends hard and aquaintances easily. I keep to myself and like who I like. But, once your in, your in for life. The big problem with this is that I so miss my last Pastor and his wife, now that we go to a new church. Thinking about that makes me want to cry, right now.
8. I could have lived a long and happy life not ever having read about my lil' SIL having something call a Mirena IUD.

There...the rules state that I have to pass this on to 8(eight) people. Um, if you've read closely, (number seven(7)) you'd realize that I'd be hard pressed to know 8(eight) bloggers. I know two(2)......

I Love Ludington!!!

Kim and I just celebrated our 16th anniversary last week. Now, 16 years may not seem like a lot, but when you consider that we got engaged 17 years ago, started going steady 21 years ago and start to 'like' each other some 25 years ago, and that I'm 38 years old, well, then you can see we got something goin' on!

Kim's family introduced me to Ludington years ago. My FiL's Aunt and Uncle lived there, so he got to go there as a kid (I think he heard Abraham Lincoln give a speech there when he was a boy, but I could be making that up), and he's still is going.

Any way, I thought it would be cool to go there for our anniversary this year, so I made the plans to ditch the kids, reserved a room at the Lakeside Inn of Ludington, rent a Ford Fusion for kicks and spend our anniversary there.

It was as pretty as it ever has been. Since the last time we were there, they've added a new park down by the Marina and have opened the North Shore Light House to the public to go up into!

The weather was beautiful, if not a tad bit windy and cool on the lake. In any case, it was wonderful.
In those 'I wish' moments, I wish that we could live over there, or at the very least, have a cottage in Hamlin.
If you ever get a chance, I'd highly advise going!



I know, I know. You so dig the t-shirt!

What'd he say? What'd he say?

I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
- Robert McCloskey

A Raisin In The Sun

When I was in college, I had to take a multi-cultural literature class. I, like many of my classmates (and I suspect boatloads of others) felt like this was a total waste of time and money.

Anyway, one semester, the only class that I could take that remotely fit into the set of classes that I had to take was an African-American Lit Class.

Even though I didn't WANT to take the class, even though there were many weeks of arguments, disagreements and discussions this turned out to be one of the best classes I took in college.

I suspect that's the reason why students have to take classes like this and I am glad for the experience....drat!

I said all that to say, the last several days the poem Harlem, by Langston Hughes has been going through my pea brain, so I figured I'd share it:

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

DON'T PANIC!

Happy Towel Day everyone. I hope you all know where your towels are at!

Thanks to my wife, I do. To paraphrase Eccentrica Gallumbits: she's "the best bang since the Big One!"

A Highway, East of Omaha...

What do you think of music? Is it important? Do you need it?
I look back on my life and I realize how important it has always been, but at the same time, how much I've taken it for granted.
I know some people who LIVE in their music, who are vv passionate about the music they listen to and the bands that they like. I've always kind of envied them, but have never been them.

I think of being a kid and listening to my eight track tape player I got for Christmas. I was 9 or 10 and we were visiting my Grandparents Up North for Christmas. I got this single speaker AM/FM 8-Track player that had a strap on the side so you can carry it like a purse. I VIVIDLY remember borrowing my brothers copy of a Grass Roots 8-Track and walking around Lincoln with this thing blasting 'Temptation Eyes' and 'Sooner Or Later' and thinking I owned the world (I was probably wearing corduroy bell bottoms too!!!)
That album was awesome and I listened to it until it broke.

I remember when I got my first album. It was Bob Segers' Live Bullet album, and thinking that 'Turn the Page' was (and still is for my money) the coolest song ever. Fast forward 10 years or so and I've got twin infants that won't stop crying and mamma's gone to work. What do I do? I pull out my 'Live Bullet' CD, put Turn the Page on repeat and they quite down, and pass out. Coincidence? I think not. They knew cool too!

I remember buying a Run DMC cassette tape, trying to figure out if I really liked rap music. I can still recite a big chunk of Hard Times (spreadin' just like the flu!)

I remember HAVING to change the stereo in my first car (1980 Mustang Coupe) because it was all about the music and the factory stereo was bad. Real, real bad.

I remember paying WAY more than we can afford for a Bose Sound System when we first got married (still have it 15 years later) because the music coming out of those speakers sounded so good you couldn't believe it. We lived on the fourth floor of an apartment building. We could turn up the stereo loud enough to hear it on the first floor.

I remember playing a game with this guy I used to work with, Rick. We'd listen to WCSX while we worked at my mom and dad's ceramic shop. We'd see who could guess the name of the band that came on the radio first. It took a while, but I got good.
My brother-in-law started working there and got involved in the game too. Still to this day, he can name songs that come over the airwaves. I bet it impresses the crud out of his wife, like it does mine!!!

One of my favorite music memories is fairly recent. I've been an Eric Clapton fan for as long as I can remember. We had the opportunity to go see him in concert a few years back with some great friends of ours. I remember thinking before the concert "I wonder why someone would go see a guitar player? I mean, sure he shreds the guitar and all, but why is that different live then over the air?" (I'm a moron, I know)
Well, I got my answer when Slow Hand was RIPPING UP 'I Shot The Sheriff' and I'm on my feet yelling my head off. Seven ways AWESOME!

The reason for the question is that there is a lot of controversy going on now about online music and I realized I don't listen to music nearly as much as I used to. Now it's more about talk radio and sports. But music still matters. It still helps me get work done when I need to be intense about something. It still helps pass the time when I'm waiting for something big. I still stirs something inside when I need it most.

I signed up for Last.FM recently and am going to try and listen to a bit more music. Not only that, but I've tended to listen only to stuff I know and know I like. It think I'm gonna expand that a bit. I hear Last is good for that. I've heard someone say that the sight is psychic. It plays the song you need to hear when you need to hear it. I'll be the judge of that.

BTW, as I'm typing this...Turn the Pages plays thru my headphones....yeah!.

I love the 80's

I ran across this spoof video from the TV Show 'How I Met Your Mother'. I've never watched it, but have heard it can be funny.
This clip is about a Canadian Teen Pop Star in the Nineties going to the mall. Since this is what life looked like in my High School and at the local mall, I'd say they were ten years behind US.

For those of you in your thirties, you'll understand.


I can't decide if she reminds me more of Debbie Gibson or Tiffany :)

Pun Intended!

Ok, so if you like fish related puns, you need to watch this:


For that matter, even if you don't like fish related puns, you ought to watch this...it may change your mind.

Here's a little more fishy work that I loved growing up (without the Naruto video!)


Dr. Demento Rocked!

It's the little things

Kim started a job a few weeks ago. She works for a lady who cleans houses. It's a good job and she enjoys the work, and I enjoy the fact that we have extra income.

However, since she's been doing this, she goes into work much earlier. She used to be able to take our youngest son to school around the block.
Now, that job falls to me.
I realized this morning how much I'm enjoying this little thing.

The thing about it that I enjoy so much is, when I drop him off, he runs to the front door. Even if he's not late, he runs. I love that. I don't know why, but something about it strikes me as wonderful.
Now, you've got to understand that he's my son. That means that he's, um, less than graceful when he runs. That doesn't matter. I love to watch him as he's running to get to the school.

It reminds me of a time several years ago when Kim had a job working at the school and I was unemployed, finishing my degree. The twins were just 5 or 6 years old and I think still in pre-school. I would get them going in the morning and to this day some of my fondest memories in life is eating breakfast with them back then.

Some things sound stupid when you are young but as you age they become much more meaningful. "It's the little things that mean a lot" is one of them.

More school girl giggling

Happy Easter

BTW, Lagomorph is a geeky word for Rabbit.

It just makes me giggle like a school girl!

So, a week or so ago, my wife started the torture. It was simple enough:
"I bought you something. It should arrive in the mail in a few days."

Ok, so, now I NEED to know what it is. "Um, that's nice honey...what is it?"

Then came those words I've hated since I was old enough to want: "You'll have to wait and see!"

"wait and see?" "WAIT AND SEE!!!"
Seriously? Seriously.

So, yesterday, in the mail box, was a bubbly belemblelope with my cool whatever hidden inside.
She tossed to me as I quickly approached the door. I snatched out of mid-air, hurried in the house and ripped open the envelope like I was 10 and it was Christmas.

Inside was the coooooooolest T-Shirt you've ever seen! I actually asked for it for my birthday, but it was out of stock. My GREAT wife, waited till it came back around and got if for me. (collective AWWWEEE please)

(note to bloggers...this embedded picture is done using a new website called imgred.com. If you've ever wanted to embed pictures into your website/blog/myspace but were too polite to rip off thier bandwidth, you should check it out.)

They Might Be Giants

I'm not really into Geek Rock, but there are a couple of songs by the Geek Rock Band, They Might Be Giants that I like.

This one, like sunshine, always makes me smile.

Talkin' Baseball

For, lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone;
The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of the singing of birds is come,
And the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.

WooooHoooo!!! Today's the day. BASEBALL BASEBALL BASEBALL!!!
Opening Day. The biggest sports day in Detroit (followed closely by the NFL draft)!


Baseball is here again. It's spring, and summer is around the corner.
That means: golf, softball, golf, walks around the court, golf, bike rides and golf.

If you can't tell, I'm excited about Opening Day! The bible says "This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it."
." Well, he made 365 1/4 of these a year, but only a few did he spend extra time on: Opening Day, June 29th and November 10th.

Last year, the Tigs did awesome. They won the American League Pennant, and made it to the World Series only to lose to a good Cardnial team (blech, yuck, eesh...excuse me while I go wash out my mouth).
I was so very sad to see that the Cards lost on thier opening day. Boo hoo. [insert evil laugh here]

Anyway, I'm not so sure the rain is over and gone, but flowers are appearing, birds are a singing and the words "PLAY BALL" are heard throughout the land today.
Go TIGERS

Scruffy Looking, Nerf Herding Playa' Hata

The family watched Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back tonight, and it sent me, as usual, down memory lane.

When I first started working at FoMoCo, I worked with a bunch of Star Wars fans. It was here that I was introduced to websites like Newgrounds, FlashRing and AtomFilms.
This was just after FLASH programming started to really catch on and tons of programmers spent countless hours coming up with unbelievably useless games and videos.
A lot of these videos were used by coders to sharpen their skills, and I'd bet many of these guys used their Flash Animations to help them get jobs.
Some of them were lame. Some were filthy. Some were just wrong.

However, some of them ended up being classics.

I don't remember which one of us found this video first*, but we watched it every chance we got. I've since passed it on to my kids, (not the website!!! It's been years since if surfed the site. It's SFW for the most part, but not really appropriate for kids**) who know the entire rap.

Enjoy:


Not only did budding coders create these to sharpen their Flash coding skills, but Photoshop skills too. Probably the biggest of the early COMBO vids was called All Ur Base R Belong 2 Us. This is an example of one of things that just caught on in the Nerd community. Both of these would probably be considered Viral Videos of their day.


*Young Chadwick probably found it first. A cool thing about Chad is that he's the ONLY person I've ever seen with a Tattoo of The New Republic Insignia. How cool is that!?!

**Whether or not it's appropriate for adults can be debated too!!!

Freedom of Religion...gotta love it.

The Bill of Rights protects our rights of religion by making it difficult for the governemnt to get involved with religion. I got no issue with this. As a matter of fact, it's one of the things that makes us a great nation. (Yes, we still are a great nation!)

That said, sometimes you come across people in religions that are soooo very bizarre. There was the whole Jim Jones thing, the Brannch Dividians with David Koresh and we can go on and on.

Many of these, like those listed above, are more about power hungry/delusional men who, as far as I can tell, don't know anything about the God I serve.

However, not all these wackos are like the Heaven's Gate wackoes. This is a story about one of those far, far out beliefs, that our lovely Bill of Rights protects.

It's hard to pick out my favorite quote from that story, but I think this is it:

Since then, the Flying Spaghetti Monster has gained countless followers worldwide, although there are those who remain spagnostic.

Count me in as an 'Unbeliever'!
rAmen

A Week At The Gym*

Dear Diary,

For my 40th birthday this year, my wife (the dear, sweet women) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me.

Although I am still in great shape since playing on my high school golf team 25 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

Called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swimwear. My wife seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started!

The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress

Monday:

Started my day at 6 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me.

She is something of a Greek goddess, with blonde hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile.

Woo hoo!

Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. She took my pulse after five minutes on the treadmill. She was alarmed that my pulse was so fast, but I attributed it to standing next to her in her Lycra outfit. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today.

Very inspiring. Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a fantastic week!!

Tuesday:

I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door.

Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air, and then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda's rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel great! It's a whole new life for me.

Wednesday:

The only way I can brush my teeth is by lying on the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals.

Driving was okay as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a Geo in the club parking lot.

Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is very annoying.

My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why, in the name of all good and just, would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators?

Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other stuff too.

Thursday:

Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late; it took me that long to tie my shoes.

Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she wasn't looking, I ran and hid in the men's room. She sent Lars to find me, then, as punishment, put me on the rowing machine -- which I sank.

Friday:

I hate Belinda with the white hot passion of a thousand burning suns. Stupid, skinny, anemic little cheerleader. If there were a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it.

Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the *&%#@? barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. (Which I am sure you learned in the sadist school you attended and graduated magna cum laude from.) The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

Saturday:

Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching 11 straight hours of the Weather Channel.

Sunday:

I'm having the church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank God that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my wife (the evil, evil women), will choose a gift for me that is fun -- like a root canal or a vasectomy.

*I'm starting back to the gym this week....this is my fear!

Guilty Pleasures

Guilty Pleasures- a phenomenon used to denote things (pop music primarily) that people really like but are often too embarrassed to admit to.

Guilty pleasures are one of the wonders of living.
It always makes me kind of giggle when I'm endulging in a guilty pleasure, when someone notices me, and I quickly cover up whatever it is I'm doing/watching/listening to. It doesn't make any sense. If I like and enjoy whatever that pleasure is, why would I be ashamed that I'm doing it? Why wouldn't I want to share?!
Why do I care what you think? I enjoy it, that settles it.

But the fact is, that's not usually the case. Usually*, I pull a stop and hide action. Switch off the iPod, change the station, stop singing what I'm singing, whatever needs to happen to make sure YOU don't know that I enjoy something that EVERYONE else thinks is goofy/silly/childish/out dated.

Now, this bothers me! I like what I like, and that's what I like. So, I'm posting here to come clean. I'm gonna admit some of my guilty pleasures. Not all of them, cause I can't remember them all. I'm sure I got zillions.

My most favoritest guilty pleasure is Neil Diamond music.
I LOVE IT when Sweet Caroline (bah bah baaaahhh) comes on the iPod. I don't know what it is about Neil's music, but it always lightens my mood. He just had a way about singing and great style and a wonderful voice. But who listens to Neil Diamond? Huh? Who I ask you? 70 year olds, that's who! No self respecting Gen-Xer would be caught dead listening to Cracklin' Rose. I'm sure if I get caught I'm gonna be forced to listen to some Nirvana or U2 or something like that, but I can't help it!
I also like John Denver (who helped inspire this post), Abba and Weird Al so there.

Cartoons:
My name is Donnie and I'm a cartoon addict. I realize that I'm 35, 36, 37, ok 38 but I've watched cartoons since I could remember. It doesn't really matter which ones either...I like 'em all. Growing up, I remember watching things like the Superfriends, Smurfs (which is a big admission in itself), Rocky and Bullwinkle, Popeye, Scooby Doo, Captain Caveman, Fat Albert and so many many more. I guess it's just a thing...I'm betting I'm not the only guy my age who still loves cartoons, though...Today's cartoons are mostly ok. I'm sure it's just like when I was a kid, some where drivel, some were ok and some were awesome. Today, cartoons like Avatar: The Last Airbender, Code: Lyoko and such are really cool and interesting. Sure, there's a bunch of JUNK (I'm talking to you Ed, Edd and Eddy, Camp Lazlo and Billy and Mandy), but still, they're cartoons...what are ya gonna do?

I guess the last one I'm gonna post about is talking to myself. I do it all the time. What's even worse, I argue with myself, out loud. I do it all the time. I think the reason why is that it helps me work out emotions, things that confuse me (no comments please) and situations I'm about to walk into. I'm not really sure if this qualifies as a guilty pleasure, but it definately fits the criteria. When I'm chatting away, and someone comes by, or looks at me, ZIP I stop right away. Sometimes I'll giggle at what they must be thinking.

Ok, so what. I bet you've got some of your own. Maybe you are a closet Hee-Haw fan. Maybe you eat White Castle Hamburgers...SOBER.
What are your guilty pleasures? The world wants to know!


*Sometimes, when I'm in the mood or in the moment, it wouldn't matter if Bill Ford walks into my cube, I'm gonna finish the Sweet Caroline chorus...ask the people who sit across from me at work....they'll tell you!

Song of the Turtle

For, lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone;
The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of the singing of birds is come,
And the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.

This may be the very first piece of biblical scripture I ever heard or cared about. Every year, on the Great Voice of the Great Lakes, the first game of Tiger Baseball Spring Training would start with this quote.

I am a big baseball fan and when I was a kid, there were few things better than listening to Ernie Harwell call a baseball game on a summers evening. And NOTHING said summer was coming like Spring Training and the Voice of the Turtle quote by Ernie. Many years, this first game came during the week, so I was at school (stupid school). But some years that first game came on Saturday or Sunday, and you know you could find me by a radio, waiting for Ernie to come on and tell me spring is coming.

Even though Ernie has retired from Tiger Baseball broadcasting, he is still invited to interviews to quote the beautiful scripture.

Most people look to that stupid groundhog to tell them spring is coming. For me, there are only two things that do it for me.
1. Spring Training
2. Masters commercials on TV

Well, the Tigers are 2-0 in spring training and you can see Masters commercials on CBS all weekend long.
Spring is coming!

Life is complicated

Do you ever feel sorry for someone whom you probably should not? I am a bit of a soft heart, so it is kind of easy for me to feel sorry for people. However, I find that not everyone is this way.
For example, I had felt sorry for Paris Hilton. I realize that in many respects the abuse that she has taken and the embarrassment she has endured are largely due to her own actions. However I still feel sorry for all the trouble and ridicule that has been heaped upon her.
I have argued this with family and co-workers alike. I admit, I've got a tough sell here. Many times people in Paris' position (hehe) deserve what they get, it is said. It is a work of their own doing, and they have to reap what they sow.
Whereas, I can not disagree with this on its face, I do still feel sorry for people who are constantly ridiculed, no matter the cause.

Another person to whom I have begun to feel sorry for as of late is Britney Spears. Much like Paris, she's brought a lot of this on herself, but you got to believe that she would do much better if she had a parent (or two) who were/had looking/looked out for her, or if she had a good friend, husband, pastor, girlfriend, doorman, blogger, whatever that she could trust to give her good advise. Advise like "Don't marry that loser!" or "Put some clothes on". Simple, plain advise.

She is a great example of the phrase 'life comes at you fast', and in that vein of thought, I would like to introduce you to a blog I came across called Indexed, that, if you like XKCD, you will like Indexed as well.
In particular, it had a blog that referenced Britney and her troubles of late.

Great Wolf Lodge

Whew...what a few days.
We took our lives into our hands yesterday and ventured into "Enemy Territory", also known as Ohio.
I know, I know...you're saying to yourself "NOOOO! Why would you risk life, limb and points on your driving record to go into Ohio?"

In general I would agree. Ohio is not a destination...it is a nuisance...it's a thing to be endured, driven thru and avoided if at all possible. However, it is also the home of The Great Wolf Lodge.

My wife, somehow, convinced me that I'd LOVE to spend a few days at a waterpark...where there is water...in a park. I've been to waterparks before, but have never been all that impressed. Now, I'd have to drive for 2 hours to get to one, and, did I mention it was in Ohio?
Well, she worked her feminine wiles on me (again) and the result was we ended up in Sandusky yesterday afternoon.

You know the bugger of it? It was a lot of fun. The kids enjoyed it, Kim enjoyed it, and yes I enjoyed it. This place is a waterpark with an emphasis on both Water and Park.
Kim snapped a picture of the kids, just before they were about to get pummeled with 1000 gallons of water.

Number one reason to NOT speak publicly!

I've been speaking publicly in church for over 10 years. In all that time, this has been one of my biggest fears....I kinda feel for this guy, but it IS funny!

Invasion of a bunch of girls

Girls girls, everywhere are girls!
Seriously.
Everywhere.

This has happened once before, and it looks like history is repeating itself!

One of my daughters best friends, two of my four five six nieces and the three daughters of one of our families best friends...plus my daughter.

My wife tells me that it was my idea to invite them all over but I seem to remember saying something about taking the boys to a hotel too....she doesn't remember that part.

So there are six girls under the age of 12 in my house.

Yeah, I know...I'm a Saint.

Anyway, one of the coolest things that happens over here when we got all this sugar, spice and everything nice is a little thing called Dance Dance Revolution (DDR). DDR is cool and if you've never tried it, you should.
Whereas it's not as sick as Guitar Hero, it's definately worth a roll.

I said all that to say this...my little niece, Claire, talked me into playing a game with her...and my darling wife snapped this photo....heheheh.

What do you do?

I've read that "Writers write."
I don't know if I want to be a 'writer' but I do know that would like to be a better writer than I am now. That's a big part of the reason why I started this blog. It's a place where I can get some thoughts out of my brain as well as try to see if I have a 'voice', what that 'voice' sounds like and if I have any talent at this.

Part of the reason why I have this desire is because I read. I read things that, after I read them I think: 'Wow, that's cool. I wanna be able to do that.'

I've point to Wil Wheaton a bunch as part of my inspiration for this. One of his inspirations, John Scalzi wrote something that I really enjoyed reading and figured I'd point you to it. It's called The Exisitential Plight of Chester Chipmate

Also, for those of you who would also like to write a bit better, either for enjoyment or for other reasons, here's something else he's written.
1. Writing Tips for Non-Writers
2. Advice on writing
3. How much you should write each day

Half As Much As Tomorrow

On my way home from work yesterday, I heard a comedy skit by Bill Engvall yesterday on the way home from work called Now That's Awesome.
In it, Bill talks about how, because of the 90's, we overuse the word Awesome.

I'd have to agree.

There are few things that I've seen that truly earn that term.
Yosemite National Park....Awesome
The birth of my children....Awesome
Seeing God work in the lives of family and friends....Awesome.
Those have all inspired awe and wonder in me like few other things.

What has been the most awesomest part of my life for the longest is my wife.
She's awesome. In every way.
She's been a major part of my life since is was THIRTEEN YEARS OLD. I'm 38 now...you do the math.
In that time, we've broke up a few times, made up even more times, been mad at each other and been madly in love at others. Through the entire time, she's been my center, my compass, at times my conscience, and at other times the reason I've been in trouble.
Everything I see in her I admire/love/lust after/harken to/etc. more today than I did on the day we got hitched. Hopefully when we're old and she's grey (I'm already there) I'll be able to say the same thing.

I'm not gonna get all sappy and such here in my blog (you're welcome), but I do want to convey here the truth of Spiral Starecase song....I can honestly say I love my wife more today than I have ever loved her before, and fully intend on loving her more in the future than I do today.

That's Awesome.

Back in the day...

So, in my last post, I may have seemed a bit, um, hmmmm, cheesed. I wasn't really; I was just kinda fed up with all the cold weather crankiness.

While I was in the mood to reminisce, I happened to be surfing around the usual haunts and for whatever reason, a memory popped in the old cranium.
So, I jumped into the WABAC (for those of you under 30, that's pronounced way-back) machine, also now known as You Tube and did a search.

When I was young, I had a huge affinity for cheesy Japanese TV.
Godzilla, Gamera, Jet Jaguar....I could watch them all day.

I remember going to my local dollar show when I was a kid to watch Godzilla vs. The Mechanical Monster back to back to back. It was awesome!

As you can imagine from this, I was a huge babe magnet. But on the rare Saturday Nights that the hotties weren't banging down my door to go out with me, I could even be found watching KUNG FU THEATER!

One of my favorites of the entire genre was Ultraman. (In a superjet he comes from a billion miles away....Loved it loved it loved it).
I would come home from school, and jump on Channel 20 to get my fix. First there would be Johnny Sokko and His Flying Robot (another Japanese TV show), Ultraman, Get Smart, Batman and if dinner was late, The Green Hornet. But when I was outside with my buddies, the super hero I wanted to be was Ultraman.

So, back to my story, I hit You Tube up for some Ultraman and FOUND IT!!! I watched the very first episode, from 1966. It was exactly as I remembered. The episode was broken up into three parts, but it was awesome.

I think one of the things I like so much about those kinds of shows is how serious the actors tried to be, but how utterly silly they actually were. The dialog was terrible, the special effects were hideous, the monsters were ridiculous and the premise was silly. Perfection.

I don't like to live in the past. There's no future in it. But I do like to visit now and then, and for people that grew up like and when I did, You Tube is as cool as 8mm Super, Slide Shows, Photographs and the like to help remember.

I also don't really like to think of the hours that I wasted sitting in front of the TV. There were lots of them. I could have been solving world hunger, inventing the cure for cancer or at the very least doing my homework.

However, those hours paid off in the many hours I spent with my buddies pretending to be an outer space man, a caped crusader, a masked hero with a cool side kick (and no matter what you say, having Bruce Lee as a sidekick is as cool as it could get), and all those other really neat and really cheesy superheroes of my youth.

I don't really know what that buys me now-a-days, but for a half hour the other day, when I was watching the Science Patrol fly in the planes and shoot at the bad monster, well, it was cool and I had a grin on my face the whole time.

Now, I'm gonna have to find some time to check out Johnny Sokko….NOW ROBOT!

Waxing Nostalgic Debunked

If you live most anywhere in the Northern or Eastern parts of the good ole' US of A, you may have noticed that it's been a bit cold of late.
Just a bit.
The first two days of this week were cold enough to have many, not all, schools closed in Southeastern Michigan.
The Windshield* factor hit minus 20 in some cases and school administrators felt these dangerously low temperatures would be a danger to those kids who walk to school or had to wait outside in the cold/dark mornings for the bus.

This produced quite a ruckus around here. I've heard more 'When I was a kid' comments over the last few days then I can stand. It seems that people are up in arms over the schools being closed because they don't EVER REMEMBER having days off of school because of the temperature.

There are two things about this that is irritating.
1. Just because they can't remember it, doesn't mean that it didn't happen. I can vividly remember once when school was cancelled the night prior because of the weather forecast. When the morning came, the promised snow was no where to be found but we still had the day off.
Unless you lived in parts of the state/country where deep cold and heavy snow are a constant, you got days off when the weather was bad. Period. Just because you don't remember it, doesn't mean it didn't happen.

2. Lets suppose for a second that it's true and people didn't have those days off of school. That 'back in the day' parents did send their kids to school when it was a trillion below zero. Is that supposed to impress me? All that means is that parents took unnecessary risk with their children's lives for no real reason. Missing a day or two of school for the kids because of the weather will have ZERO effect on their education in the long term, but the POTENTIAL damage for children who have to wait out in the cold weather 20 minutes for a bus that may or may not come can be terrible.
I realize that it's only potential damage, but still, is it worth it? Not to me.

Back in those same days, parents didn't cover up electrical sockets, didn't lock-up poisonous kitchen chemicals and didn't have gates up over stairways. For the most part, we all survived. Does that mean taking the precautions that we do now are silly? Of course not. Oh, and for those who didn't survive...only a little precaution; a plastic 5 cent cover, a simple drawer lock, a wooden or plastic gate, would have made a huge impact on their lives.

People often wax nostalgic for the halcyon days of their youth, when in actuality things were rough then too, they just choose to forget. You often hear about the longing for the 'Cleaver' experience or the 'Ozzie and Harriet' life.
Actually, those days had their own sets of trouble that I wouldn't want now. So many stay at home moms had such serious depression and were so over-medicated that the Rolling Stones wrote a song about Mothers Little Helper.
Rape, which happened way too often, was rarely reported because of the impact on the family.
Out of wedlock pregnancies resulted in the young mothers being ostracized and their children being labeled bastards!
Oh let's go back!

Here's your sign...

You just gotta wonder about some people.
I was reading about the County Treasurer from Alcona County who got involved in an email scam. The story says:

Thomas Katona, 56, was arraigned in Harrisville today after an investigation that began in December when county officials learned he had directed eight unauthorized wire transfers totaling $186,500 to beneficiaries linked to the Nigerian Advance scheme, Cox said in a statement. Investigators also found that Katona had wired $72,500 of his own money to the same accounts.

So, not only did the guy steal a big portion of the counties funds, but he emptied his bank account also.
What makes this really hit home for me is that I've got a ton of family that lives in Alcona County. Those people up there can't really afford to have this kind of stuff happen.
You just have to wonder how this guy got his job don't you? I'm sure this couldn't have been his first brush with stupidity. I guess this just goes to show you that stupid people should come with their own sign.

If you've ever thought about responding to one of those email scams, hopefully the PSA below will disuade you:

Happy Birthday

My wife and I got to meet a new member of our extended (re: work) family yesterday. Her name is Mia and she is: a doll; cutie; sweetheart; (unpack your own adjective here, just as long as it's sweet!).

Her folks are some of the nicest people you're gonna meet.
We've gotten to know them over the last few years and really enjoy their company.

We got her some cute little boots and an pink outfit that she won't be able to wear until sometime next year :)

If we were more clever (which wouldn't be hard), we would have gotten them something from one of the white trash stores (you know, Old Navy, The Gap, etc) cause little Mia's mommy is a bit picky on the stores she goes into (and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to tease her about it).

I'm always reminded of the line from the Ded Bob Show where Ded Bob says he's gonna be all over this lady like, and I quote, 'Old Navy on White Trash'.
That may be, just may be, the funniest thing ever said by a puppet.
What makes it particularly funny is that we like Old Navy close and don't really dispute our White Trashi-ness!

We could have gone over the top and bought her something from White Trash Mecca, Wal-Mart, but that would have just been mean, and everyone knows I'm not just mean.

Anyways, I digress and say, congrats to the (once again) new mommy and daddy!
All looks to be fine as wine and dandy as candy.


*couldn't find a good poem with Mia in it, so I found the next best thing....enjoy

Found it on eBay

Well, I've done it. After years and years of procrastination I've gone and done it.

I've bought AND sold on eBay.

I can't really say why I've never really bought much on eBay. I've shopped there many many times, but always preferred Brick and Mortor stores to the eShopping of eBay. That's all changed.

We recently upgraded our cell phone service and for doing that, we received two new Razr cell phones from Motorola. That was cool...free is almost always good. It was cool until I went to buy car chargers and belt clips for both of them. At the verizon store, they were (you may need to sit for this) $40.00 A PIECE for a charger clip combo. $80 bucks for some plastic and wire.

Well, that's silly. So, off to eBay I went. Bought THE SAME THING on eBay (new, yes, brand spanking new) for $13.00 for both. Including shipping and handling. That is a savings of, what, $67.00. That's not chump change there. That's real cheese.

So, seeing as I was now the eBay king, because I saved $67.00, I decided to sell some speakers that I've had for a few years. So, I dialed up eBay, signed up as a seller, and auctioned off two speakers. Some dude from Georgia bought them yesterday for $200.00 plus $20.00 Shipping and Handling. Nice. A good deal for both of us.

Not sure if I'll do a bunch more of either buying or selling on eBay, but it's proven to be a fun little experience. I'm considering letting the kids give this a try. Find a toy or something that they don't use/play with/like anymore and see if they can sell it. I think it'll be an educational thing for them to do...the whole free market thing. We'll see.

In any case, if you've been hesitent to give eBay a try or any kind of electronic shopping, start with something small, where there is an obvious savings for you and see if you enjoy the experience. Saving gobs of money should be fun for all.